You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
