the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Randomize
