Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
