It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I pour the whiskey from now on
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