margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
