I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
Randomize
