wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
