Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
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