You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
