? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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