I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
pop tarts are not kleenex
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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