I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Randomize
