carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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