Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
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