just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
