Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
whose ass print is on the piano?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
