happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
