have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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