i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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