so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
