Your tits are I can't wait for
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
How's work?
Spinning.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
