It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
