if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
