I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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