How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
