I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
