Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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