she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
