He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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