SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
