And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize
