Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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