just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
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