would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
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