So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
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