I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
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