I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I'm at about main and main street
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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