Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
