I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
