Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
