I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
