Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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