her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
