Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
Randomize
