To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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