I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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