I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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