you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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