Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
