i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
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